


Extended Family

by Officially_The_Worst_Lobster_Ever



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Basically Learning About Necromancy From Your Dad And Your Cool Goddess Friend Is Very Cool, But also TAZ Graduation, Gen, I Don't Understand Tags Sorry, I Miss The Balance Crew :(, Kravitz is a very cool bird, Lots Of Bones Here, Necromancy, Nothing Like Learning About Death From A Real Pro, Rainer is the Best, TAZ Balance, The Raven Queen Is An Icon, does this count as a crossover?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-04-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 18:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23811214
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Officially_The_Worst_Lobster_Ever/pseuds/Officially_The_Worst_Lobster_Ever
Summary: Rainer Michelle is amazed by the wonders of necromancy. Her father teaches her many things, but she's "dying" to test her skills.When she's not busy ensuring that no mischievous souls have evaded death, the Raven Queen takes on a pupil. Kravitz helps.
Relationships: Rainer & Rainer's Dad, Rainer & The Raven Queen
Kudos: 13





	Extended Family

**Author's Note:**

> I don't really write fics much but I think this is my longest so far?  
> I've been dying to write about Rainer because I love her so much, and when I heard her pa's a lich I automatically thought of the Balance Crew?? Anyways, yeah.  
> I literally don't know how to write dialogue so I guess I'll just suffer
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

Rainer says her father taught her everything she knew about necromancy, but that wasn’t _entirely_ true.

Of course, her father taught her the essentials- the most important things to know as a necromancer. When he wasn’t busy working at the local potion shop, he would call her over to the kitchen to teach her. Even now, she fondly recalls watching as he walks over to the window and picks out a particularly successful spider’s web. He carefully inspects the unfortunate flies, ants, and other little critters that had passed in the web’s sticky embrace, nodding to himself as he squints.

> “Now, watch carefully, sunshine!”

He brings his hand up to the web carefully.

> “Balance and patience are _essential,_ Rainer.”

He lightly taps the center of the web, sending out a small wave of light. As it spread slowly throughout the web, the creatures began to reawaken, spreading their legs out and crawling against the surface that had guaranteed their deaths. Rainer gasped as a reanimated ladybug landed on her hand.

> “That’s amazing!”
> 
> “And one day, if you practice really hard, _you_ can do this, too.”
> 
> “Really?”

She watched as the ladybug crawled around aimlessly on her hand. Its dull red carcass seemed to get brighter.

> “Of course.”

Slowly, yet surely, she began to learn more as he showcased his abilities: he reanimated spiders, worms, mice, birds, and even _squirrels,_ all while Rainer watched in amazement. He would leave out his books on necromancy, pretending not to notice as she sat by his desk reading. Rainer learned how to perform countless spells and cantrips, eagerly awaiting an opportunity to test her skills.

But when she entered the world of slumber, Rainer’s learning took on a more hands-on approach.

Rainer always had the most surreal dreams, pleasant and uncanny alike. Most often, they took place in a small room, with shimmering black walls and murky indigo floors. She quickly learned that staring at the walls made her uncomfortable: they seemed to extend on infinitely, pulling her into the void. In this room, there was always a throne: feathers carved into its polished ebony, countless scars from ages of wear. In front of it stood a woman: tall, broad-shouldered, and proud. A dress of murky, infinite feathers; A curved beak, sharp as a dagger. Eight eyes, brown as burnt umber, peered down at the girl. The figure spoke, with a voice both chilling and comforting: 

> “Welcome back, little sun.”

And Rainer, ever enthusiastic to see her dear friend, would look up with a smile.

> “Hello, auntie!”

Clinging onto her shoulder-as if one gust would knock it from its perch- was a raven. It peered at her curiously, a glint in its red eyes. Every time the little girl would visit, the raven would fly down to see her, landing clumsily on her arm. It would hold a wing up, as if signaling a wave, and she would smile in return.

> “Well, Mr. Bird! It looks like you’re doing well!”

As she enters the room, she can’t help but get excited. With her dearest aunt, there was always a fun time in store. Rainer watches carefully as the woman walks towards her, her feathery hands cupped. 

> “Your task _this_ time is… rather simple.” 

Rainer leans forward as the woman before her opens her hands, revealing a small pile of bones.

The woman would show her, carefully, calmly, how to bring them to life:

> “First, you must see it as it is.”

Rainer stares at the bones plainly.

> “It’s a pile of bones,” she whispers, sticking out a finger to poke it. Her auntie hummed.
> 
> “It is _dead_.”

Rainer nodded.

> “Yep! Sure seems like it.”

She touched one of the bones, rubbing her finger along its smooth, chalky edges. 

> “Although this is dead in the _present_ , it was once a living thing. _This_ is the most important thing to remember.”

She swipes a feathery hand over the bones, allowing a small stream of blue magic to flow into them. This small river of light worked wonders: the bones rattled and clattered against each other, quickly coming together to form the shape of a squirrel. The rodent crawls around her hand, as if looking for hidden seeds. Upon seeing the woman’s eyes staring down at it, the squirrel’s spectral tail stood straight up. Finally, she swipes her hand over the creature again, and it becomes a pile of bones.

> “Try it.”

Rainer offers her hands, and the woman lets the bones fall gently.

The girl stares down at them, squinting and murmuring.

> “Dad told me I just have to…”

Her father stood at the door to his room. His daughter sat by his desk, slowly creeping her hand towards another necromancy book. In her other hand was a dead mouse, crumpled in a pitiful ball. 

He knocked lightly on the door, causing her to drop the book in surprise. Before she could even come up with an excuse, he had made his way to the desk, sitting down beside her.

> “Trying to do some magic, sunshine?”

She nodded fiercely.

> “I found this mouse on the porch, and I thought I could… _bring it back?”_

She cradled the broken thing in her hands, shielding it from the world.

> “Well now, there’s one thing you should _always remember_ when you are trying to revive something!”

Her father gently picked up the corpse from her hands. He held his hand over it lightly, letting a stream of purple magic flow into its body.

> “Don’t forget,” he began, looking up at her with a smile.

The memory came back so suddenly.

> “Feel the flow of magic! Let life flow out from my fingertips!”

The raven tilted its head suddenly, seemingly surprised by her sudden outburst.

> “Sorry, Mr. Bird. You wouldn’t understand. You’re just a _bird_!”

The raven looks off into the distance -as if an audience was watching from afar- and winks. Unfortunately, had an audience truly been present, most of the crowd would certainly have been several feet to the left of where he looked. The raven groomed himself impatiently. 

_It’s the thought that counts._

Cautiously, she places her hand over the fallen critter, whispering lightly:

> “Come on, you can do it. Wake up!”

A small wisp of silvery magic flows from her hand, gradually making its way towards the remnants of the sciurid. Her eyes lit up as the bones began to clatter, drawing closer to each other. A pile of collagen and calcium eventually becomes a bony squirrel with a silvery aura. It began to cling to her hand, it’s skull turning towards the feathered woman cautiously.

> “Perfect, my dear. You’ve done well.”

The woman nods, inspecting the rodent carefully. The raven, bored of fluffing himself up for a nonexistent audience, flew close by, perching perilously on Rainer’s shoulder. He inches down her arm, attempting to get a better look at the girl’s new friend. Suddenly, the squirrel turns, ending up face-to-face with the bird. 

> “Ah!”

The bird jumped backwards, and fell to the group with an unexpectedly large _thump._

> “That was… horrendous.”

Rainer turned around. Where there was once a bird there was now a cloud of dark feathers. Coughing furiously, a man emerged, quickly brushing off his suit and adjusting his posture. He opened his mouth to speak, but then realized the girl’s surprise.

> “Uh… _‘ai._ ”

The feathered woman rolled her eyes.

> “Kravitz, _please_ stop with the accent. I’m _begging_ you,” she insists, walking over to brush a few feathers off of his shoulder.

The girl looked up at him suspiciously.

> “Kravitz?”

The man smiles nervously.

> “You can still call me Mr. Bird, if you really want to.”

Rainer thought about it, while the squirrel grew more courageous, climbing up her shoulder and lightly grasping at her blonde hair. After a moment of deep consideration, she smiles.

> “Ok, Mr. Kravitz-Bird!”
> 
> “That works too,” he says with a sigh. 

The Raven Queen waits patiently, ever-watching.

  
This was not the end of Rainer’s training. As the years went on, her father would teach her how to keep her magic safe and efficient, while her mysterious “aunt” would reveal to her the greatest secrets of their craft, allowing her to pave her own way to success. Time after time, the woman would ask the girl “What can _you_ do?” And time after time, Rainer would pick her head up, look up at her auntie’s eight shimmering eyes with determination and pride, and answer “ _Anything._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope y'all liked this/didn't hate it! I spent a solid 20-30 minutes trying to understand how a Cockney accent works. It was a fun experience, but I definitely don't know enough to have Kravitz use it the entire time. Oops!
> 
> I'm planning out more for a second/third chapter, but I procrastinate a lot so this might end up being a one-off!  
> (Just wanted to let y'all know)
> 
> Anyways if you thought this was decent and you want to see more bad content you can find me on Tumblr at "horrible-evil-lobster."
> 
> Have a good one :-)


End file.
